The ways we grieve

The ways we grieve. I have grieved in many ways.

I have tried to escape it by running or distracting, consuming. I have isolated myself, pushing all love and support away. Feeling lost and alone even when people were around, attempting to spare myself from the pain of another loss.

This time, this time I am going face first. Facing my grief head on. Going to the feelings when they come, collapsing when I have too, and laughing too.

 I have tried to run from it, delve into bad decisions. Drank too much, went out too much, made poor romantic decisions. Settled for far less than I am worth because I was searching for some kind of comfort in my profound loss.

I have run away, moved across the country on a whim to escape the memories lurking around every street corner in this town that suddenly grew too small. Everywhere I looked, everyone I saw, everything I did brought me back to a memory of you.

People told me seeing me made them sad because they could not see me without thinking of you.

Some people dive into productivity or work. Thinking if they never slow down it will not hurt so much, will not catch up to them.

 Some people cling tightly for so long they almost become their grief. Some people deny their feelings, their grief. Burying it down as if it does not exist. Not recognizing their outburst or irritation is grief peaking through.

These are some of the ways I have grieved or seen grief. What about you? How have you experienced grief? How did you cope?

I would love you comments, feedback, or stories.

Here we grieve again.